25 Hilarious Lies Mums Told Their Kids

25 Hilarious Lies Mums Told Their Kids

Which lies have you told to your children to get yourself out of a sticky situation? Whether it’s getting yourself out of having to buy something, or do something or as a simple TAT (tantrum avoidance tactic) the members of The Motherload Facebook community have got it covered.

Eleanor got this brilliant thread started with the top three suggestions.

So, here are 25 Hilarious Lies Mums Told Their Kids…

1.  The park is closed when it’s cold.

2. Children’s TV stops at 5 (we only have Netflix).

3. Juice before bed gives you nightmares.

4. Amazon only let you place one order a month.

5. No, you can’t eat this really yummy food because it’s spicy!

6. Every meat is chicken.

7. When you hear the ice cream van bell, it means they’ve run out.

8. McDonalds only sells carrots on Saturdays.

9. The TV needs to charge (like all the other electronic devices he is aware of!)

10. The gift shop is only open for adults.

11. The chocolate bars have gone mouldy.

12. I put the clocks forward on a school night. Eldest is six and thinks she goes to bed at 8.30pm. Really she goes at 7.30pm.

13. Horrid Henry has been removed from Netflix.

14. Zoo animals don’t come out in the winter.

15. I told my kids a Chewit was a sleeping tablet and they all fell straight asleep after having them (they were 9,8,5).

16. It’s broken (for all £1 rides in supermarkets!) – NB I’m not mean, they can sit as long as they like.

17. They don’t sell ice creams in Tesco in the winter, the boxes are just to keep the space in the freezers.

18. That me and their dad met on the first ever X Factor and that daddy won and I came second.

19. The sweet counter doesn’t actually have real sweets they are all pretend.

20. We’ve run out of batteries.

21. You have to go to bed early as the best dreams are handed out first, so if you stay up late you get the rubbish ones.

22. Sweetcorn is yellow peas.

23. The Harpic toilet freshener that you clip to the toilet is a camera and tells me who flushed the toilet and who washed their hands

24. If the kids have a soup or stew with vegetables in it, I use the “vegetable remover” (also known as a blender)

And last but not least…

25. If you misbehave at McDonald’s you get a sad meal instead of a happy meal. The toy is broken and someone takes a bite of your burger.

Like this? Share it, and spread the MOLO love! You can read more brilliant threads and stories from The Motherload community and for the latest from our bloggers, head to our homepage.

Huge thanks to Eleanor, Jackie, Rebi, Danielle, Keeley, Christine, Lorna, Gayle, Hayley, Natalie, Clare, Laura, Jodi, Liz, Victoria, Laura, Whitney, Louise, Emma and Chloe

Cover image credit: Flickr/Suicidepirate “Lies”

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