Ah, Christmas. A time for Baileys, mince pies, the laughter of children, another Baileys and fairy lights twinkling on a beautifully decorated tree. It is also the perfect time to pull on your Christmas jumper and get in the spirit of things.
Wear it on the school run, to toddler playgroup, to the supermarket, to the annual nativity show but whatever you do, wear it with pride (and your tongue ever-so-slightly in your cheek).
Plus, if you sign up to Save The Children’s Christmas Jumper Day being held on December 16, you can help save lives, too.
Without further ado, we bring you The Motherload® Guide to Christmas Jumpers…
Love a tipple? Love a bit of Mariah? Grab this glamorous red number from Matalan with the slogan All I Want for Christmas is
You Wine, £15.
This is not the time of year to worry about calories, ditch the diet and follow the advice on this Christmas Calories sweatshirt, £12, also from Matalan.
Keep it classy and pop on this luxury Ho, Ho, Prosecco sweatshirt, £29, from notonthehighstreet.com, just make sure you have an actual bottle of fizz to hand.
Do some good and pop over to the Selfish Mother shop, www.thefmlystore.com, where until December 31, 50% of the price of each jumper sold in the ‘Save the Children Collection’ will be donated to Save the Children. I love this Off Duty Elf sweatshirt, £45, designed by illustrator Cheryl Rawlings.
If you don’t mind a few jibes about having a red breast, this sequinned robin jumper, £26, from Dorothy Perkins is just the ticket.
Who cares if Santa’s watching, it’s boring being good all the time, eh? Stick two fingers up at Old Saint Nick in this cream Up to Snow Good jumper, £14.99, available from www.newlook.com.
Single mommas, spell it out, quite literally, for the hot, single dad you see in the playground every day with a Meet Me Under The Mistletoe sweater, £14.99, from New Look. Go for it!
Get behind our boys in the armed forces, many of whom won’t be home with their families this Christmas by purchasing a cute bear jumper, £35 from www.helpforheroes.org.uk.
For the love of God, someone please tell me they have a partner in their life who would wear this ‘Santaboss’ suit £59, from www.opposuits.co.uk outside of the house. Upload pictures, immediately!
What’s good for the goose and all that, if he’s wearing his, you can wear yours, too. Grab a Christmiss Unwrappable suit £54.95, also from www.opposuits.co.uk and meet your kids at the school gates, together. I dare you.
Planning on hibernating for the winter? I don’t blame you. Pull on a onesie, like this reindeer one from Florence and Fred at Tesco £18, grab a glass of something fizzy, open the tin of Quality Street and settle down to watch It’s A Wonderful Life.
If you have a sense of humour, why not buy the entire family matching pyjamas? The options are endless if you search ‘Pj ensembles’ on Amazon.co.uk, with prices starting from £6.99.
Merry Christmas jumper (and onesie) shopping!
About Sam Curtis
Sam Curtis, 46, lives in Lincoln, in a house that’s not as clean or tidy as she’d like with her husband and their two children, a tweenage daughter and three-year-old son.
Image credit: Alison McGarragh-Murphy